Toilet Paper
I was shopping with MapGuy and Sweetheart last night in preparation for today's potluck at church. While we were wandering through the grocery store MapGuy announced that he needed to get some TP. This was done whilst looking at the cheap brand of TP. I informed him that he was not allowed to buy cheap toilet paper. He asked why not, and I told him the TP rule, "Only the best for our butts!" He disagreed, and bought the cheapest brand in the store.
After grocery shopping we returned to my house for hot chocolate with ice cream (I got to watch...). He excused himself to the washroom and joined us a short time later.
Finally 3 am rolled around and we decided that they needed to go home. As we had carpooled I drove Sweetheart home, and MapGuy to his car. Being the nice girl I am I helped him move his groceries from my car to his. I reached for the bag containing the toilet paper, and he lunged to intercept. By the time he got there, however, I had noticed that one roll was missing from his package. I thought it was odd, but thought little of it, until he said, "You weren't supposed to see that."
immediately the light bulb over my head lit up and it occurred to me what he had done. That's correct, dear reader, MapGuy had swapped my Cottenella for his Kroger. It was war! I gave him a look, and exclaimed that I couldn't believe he would do that to me! Then I sent him on his way.
When I got home I immediately replaced his roll with my own.
This morning, I had revenge in my heart as I made my way to church. There was no way he was getting off this one easily.
Right after church, before the potluck, I sneaked outside and toilet papered his car (ps, it was lovely weather, no storm clouds in sight). Nanny (who had missed the whole event) was leaving when she noticed my masterpiece. She returned to ask if Sweetheart and I were responsible. I absolved Sweetheart of all blame as I explained my actions. "Ok," she replied, "I just wanted to make sure it was you guys' doing." "Yup. All me!" Then, she left, and we went back to our potluck.
After dinner Sweetheart, the bishop's wife, and I all went out to Sweetheart's car. The bishop's wife noticed MapGuy's car (how could she not?) and asked who's handiwork it was. I (proudly) took my credit, and asked her to keep it a secret. She agreed.
Sweetheart and I left for my house. MapGuy would not be joining us tonight, because he had home teaching and some other church stuff to do. After about 30 minutes my phone rang. Who was it? MapGuy, of course. He thanked me for the present and we chatted pleasantly about nothing for the next 15 minutes. We were both surprised, however, at how little toilet paper is actually in one roll. Who knew?
After grocery shopping we returned to my house for hot chocolate with ice cream (I got to watch...). He excused himself to the washroom and joined us a short time later.
Finally 3 am rolled around and we decided that they needed to go home. As we had carpooled I drove Sweetheart home, and MapGuy to his car. Being the nice girl I am I helped him move his groceries from my car to his. I reached for the bag containing the toilet paper, and he lunged to intercept. By the time he got there, however, I had noticed that one roll was missing from his package. I thought it was odd, but thought little of it, until he said, "You weren't supposed to see that."
immediately the light bulb over my head lit up and it occurred to me what he had done. That's correct, dear reader, MapGuy had swapped my Cottenella for his Kroger. It was war! I gave him a look, and exclaimed that I couldn't believe he would do that to me! Then I sent him on his way.
When I got home I immediately replaced his roll with my own.
This morning, I had revenge in my heart as I made my way to church. There was no way he was getting off this one easily.
Right after church, before the potluck, I sneaked outside and toilet papered his car (ps, it was lovely weather, no storm clouds in sight). Nanny (who had missed the whole event) was leaving when she noticed my masterpiece. She returned to ask if Sweetheart and I were responsible. I absolved Sweetheart of all blame as I explained my actions. "Ok," she replied, "I just wanted to make sure it was you guys' doing." "Yup. All me!" Then, she left, and we went back to our potluck.
After dinner Sweetheart, the bishop's wife, and I all went out to Sweetheart's car. The bishop's wife noticed MapGuy's car (how could she not?) and asked who's handiwork it was. I (proudly) took my credit, and asked her to keep it a secret. She agreed.
Sweetheart and I left for my house. MapGuy would not be joining us tonight, because he had home teaching and some other church stuff to do. After about 30 minutes my phone rang. Who was it? MapGuy, of course. He thanked me for the present and we chatted pleasantly about nothing for the next 15 minutes. We were both surprised, however, at how little toilet paper is actually in one roll. Who knew?
posted by granola girl at 11:31 pm
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