I Wanna Be Like You-ou-ou

Mumsy got laid off yesterday. Always hard, and always a blow to the ego. It's hard to believe that it's been 2 1/2 years since I got laid off. As I see her facing this I can offer only the advice that worked for me: Take a week off. Mope. Cry and sleep in late. Then, pick yourself up and figure out what you're going to do about that. After allowing myself a week to mope I was able to get my head on straight and tackle all the things that I had put off, get those done, and then get down to the business of finding me a job.

Mostly, though, I just chatted with her. As we were talking she said something that I don't think she realizes how much it means to me. She said, "I'd like to take the opportunity to REALLY work on my painting. I am a craftsperson, and I'd like to be an artist. Like you."

We all have these images of ourselves, who we view ourselves to be, and how we like to mentally portray ourselves. I still have a hard time describing myself to others as an artist. Why? I don't know. Maybe it's because it comes so easily for me—I don't really have to work for it. Maybe it's because I haven't sold anything (well, two paintings, but they are both to the same guy, so do they really count?). Maybe it's because I've never had a show. I don't really know what it is, but it's there. Others describe me as an artist, and I let them, but sometimes I have a hard time describing myself as such. Having my mother say to me, about me, that she views me as an artist, and she aspires to that, well, let's just say, that's a compliment I couldn't have asked for.